Today's Republican Party is the living embodiment of what happens when you do not provide sex education to children. From the idea that women won't know what a pregnancy is unless an elderly male politician rapes them by proxy with an ultrasound wand to conservative women believing that a rape kit is a kind of uterine Drano
, the ignorance is simple human reproduction on the right is simply appalling. The problem is that now their ignorance is extending to the people they represent when they are in government.
Ohio's new anti-abortion law bestows full personhood on a fertilized egg that has not yet implanted
. Clearly the Republicans in Ohio's legislature who passed this travesty haven't got a clue about how pregnancy occurs. There is no pregnancy until the egg implants into the uterine wall, because up to half of all fertilized eggs never implant. There are many reasons for this, some of them having to do with the effects of the Pill and the IUD (which would under Ohio law become instruments of murder in a way that a gun, for some reason, is not), and some having to do with just plain nature -- God's will, if you prefer.
Some of the women whose fertilized eggs never implant in the uterus know about it -- because the egg implants in the fallopian tube instead. Ohio's law would have the perhaps unintended effect of making removal of an ectopic pregnancy a crime of murder, even though an ectopic pregnancy can never become a baby. I guess the dirty whore should have kept her legs closed or God wouldn't have punished her with an ectopic pregnancy -- or something; I have no idea how these people's minds work. But most women don't even know that there is a fertilized egg, because it passes out of her with her normal menstrual period.
So there's just one thing to do, ladies of Ohio: Start sending your used tampons and other sanitary products to John Kasich. Tell him that under Ohio law you are simply complying with the law that makes every fertilized egg a person and you want to make sure you do the right thing. You may end up in jail, but you can take comfort in knowing that confession of your crime is good for the soul.
Labels: abortion, batshit crazies, The Republican War on Women, Women's bodies, women's health