"Only dull people are brilliant at breakfast"
-Oscar Wilde
Brilliant at Breakfast title banner "The liberal soul shall be made fat, and he that watereth, shall be watered also himself."
-- Proverbs 11:25
"...you have a choice: be a fighting liberal or sit quietly. I know what I am, what are you?" -- Steve Gilliard, 1964 - 2007

"For straight up monster-stomping goodness, nothing makes smoke shoot out my ears like Brilliant@Breakfast" -- Tata

"...the best bleacher bum since Pete Axthelm" -- Randy K.

"I came here to chew bubblegum and kick ass. And I'm all out of bubblegum." -- "Rowdy" Roddy Piper (1954-2015), They Live
Thursday, June 27, 2013

Top 10 Reasons Paula Deen Got Fired by the Food Network

     Iconic southern cuisine chef Paula Deen has become the 21st century's Typhoid Mary for certain admissions that she'd used the "n" word and having once planned a slavery-themed wedding. This had prompted Miss Deen to plead her case to Matt Lauer yesterday in which she accused others of telling lies about her by citing her own words in a court deposition for a discrimination lawsuit and being out to destroy her. Deen ended the interview by defiantly saying, "I is what I is and I'm not changing." Since the admission, Deen has been dropped by Novo Nordisk, Target, Home Depot, the Food Network, Wal-Mart and Smithfield. (The news isn't all bad, as Fox News hastens to remind us: Deen's new cookbook, The New Testament Cookbook, just shot up from #18 to #1 on Amazon, even though it's not due to come out until October.) Aspiring writer Anne Rice also came to Deen's rescue, asking if we "had a lynch mob mentality." Deen's admissions that "of course" she used the "n" word and the slavery-themed wedding were bad enough but weren't the only ones in her deposition, What are some other self-confessed examples of Paula Deen's racism?

  • 1) Martin Luther King piƱata for oldest son's fifth birthday party.
  • 2) Election nights 2008 and 2012, shot up life-sized butter sculpture of Barack Obama in back yard.
  • 3) Field testing Creole rub on the heads of random African Americans.
  • 4) During her "Bag Lady" days in Savannah, pioneered Happy Meals by including with every bagged lunch slivers of Lester Maddox axe handles.
  • 5) During one 2005 episode of her show, once invited poet Maya Angelou but solely to wash dishes afterwards.
  • 6) Once told Emeril Lagasse on Essence of Emeril, "I love it when you say Bam! Makes me think of Medgar Evers, Dr. King and Malcolm X."
  • 7) Since 1974, every Thanksgiving turkey with little Klan hoods on drumsticks.
  • 8) Paula taught sons that, every Halloween, black people carved watermelons instead of pumpkins.
  • 9) Once asked by food magazine what wine would go best with soul food and replied, "Ripple."
  • 10) Admitted to calling Dr. Martin Luther King a "shit-skinned, tap-dancing, watermelon-munchin' jigaboo pickaninny Tar Baby" but only once or twice since his assassination.
  • Bookmark and Share
    Exceeded network's "lard" budget.

    Featured recipe for nappy-headed hoe cakes.

    Baked Nathan Bedford Forrest cake.