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"I came here to chew bubblegum and kick ass. And I'm all out of bubblegum." -- "Rowdy" Roddy Piper (1954-2015), They Live
Friday, April 20, 2012

Meet Mr. Romney's new BFF
Posted by Jill | 6:43 AM
For those of you who are not familiar with the Ted Nugent oeuvre, let me give you a brief introduction:

Ive got no inhibitions
So keep your keys out of your ignition
I steal a car like I got the curse
I cant resist the old lady's purse
Jailbait you look so good to me
Jailbait wont you set me free
Jailbait you look fine fine fine
I know Ive got to have you in a matter of time

Well I dont care if youre just thirteen
You look too good to be true
I just know that youre probably clean
Theres one lil' thing I got do to you

Jailbait you look so good to me
Jailbait wont you set me free
Jailbait you look fine fine fine
I know Ive got to have you in a matter of time

So tell your mama that Im back in town
She likes us boys when its time to get down
Shes got this craving for the underage
I just might be your mama's brand new rage

Jailbait you look so good to me
Jailbait wont you set me free
Jailbait you look fine fine fine
I know I got to have you in a matter of time

Honey you you you look so nice
Shes young shes tender
Wont you please surrender
She's so fine shes mine
All the time, all mine mine
Its all right baby
Its quite all right I asked your mama
Wait a minute officer
Dont put those handcuffs on me
Put them on her and Ill share her with you

Nice, huh? Just for the record, Ted Nugent was thirty-three years old when this song was released in 1981. Just another good Christian family-values Republican, right?

(Hell yeah, there's plenty more here.)

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Anonymous Bill said...
Thank goodness the Romneys have only male children.

Blogger D. said...
Thanks, I think.

My rock and roll memory backlog seems to have rather a lot of fetishization of underage women. Now that I think of it.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
And in addition to being a child- molester, Ted's also a draft-dodger. Weaseled out of fighting fer freedom in Veet-nam, by literally shitting all over himself.

Yep, like so many fire-breathing Repubs (Romney, too) Ted's a chickenhawk. Our boy might talk tough and wave guns around(when he's not screwing little girls), but when crunch time came, he showed the yellow streak...

But hey, IOKIYAR....

Anonymous ravefan said...
You know, when I digitized my old LP's, I came across my old Ted Nugent album from 1975 I thought what DICK! Needless to say, it remained it's old vinyl self.

Blogger Nan said...
Anon, back in the 70s and 80s Nugent claimed to be a draft dodger and that he'd done it by shitting himself, but it's possible his draft experience was actually rather benign -- the dodging the draft through being disgustingly filthy is one of the ploys mentioned in Tuli Kupferberg's 1001 Ways to Beat the Draft, and Nugent's description of what he supposedly did is practically a verbatim quote from the book. Based on Nugent's love of hyperbole and exaggeration, it's more likely he bragged about being a draft dodger when he thought it would help with his fan base, just like he's gone over the top with the NRA garbage and Obama-hating now because idiots are cheering him on.

Blogger Patricia said...
I didn't like him way back in high school when "Cat Scratch Fever" came out. Now I can't stand him. I don't get how anyone listens to his ignorant garbage. Thanks for the memories though.

Blogger D. said...
He's out of the Fort Knox concert:

The U.S. Army booted the controversial Detroit rocker from the bill of a June 23 concert at Fort Knox because of anti-Obama comments he made at a recent NRA convention.

"After learning of opening act Ted Nugent's recent public comments about the president of the United States, Fort Knox leadership decided to cancel his performance on the installation," the Army wrote on its Facebook page.

PS: I haven't seen my copy of 1001 Ways to Beat the Draft in about ten years.