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"I came here to chew bubblegum and kick ass. And I'm all out of bubblegum." -- "Rowdy" Roddy Piper (1954-2015), They Live
Wednesday, June 08, 2011


Shut the Fuck Up. Everyone. Just. Shut. The. Fuck. Up. about Anthony Weiner's wiener.

And I'm not talking about Andrew "Not So" Breitbart. Breitbart's a verbose rectum on two legs and this is what he does as he acts like the abducted conscience of the Obama administration. And I'm not talking about the Republicans because this is what "the Party of Family Values" does as if they haven't had their own scandals.

This goes out to the spineless, dickless Democrats who could possibly learn a thing or two about party loyalty and unity from their friends and colleagues on the seedier side of the aisle. And this is going out to the mainstream media who just can't enough of WeinerGate. No doubt, Maureen Dowd of the ultra liberal New York Times is clearing off a spot on her mantle for a second Pulitzer Prize.

Instead of addressing the still-important issue of where the jobs are, how we're going to balance the budget, bring down the price of gasoline that'll surely skyrocket again since OPEC fell apart today faster than French motorcycle and start asking serious questions about the existence of the "economic recovery" that began a full two years ago instead of addressing it as a matter of historical record...

...instead, we're being treated to Weiner's penis all the time. No Democrat penis has been paid this much attention to since the joyride of the Clenis 13 and a half years ago. It's like the Balloon Boy all over again only with a tent.

And unless the Republicans can go back in time and retroactively demand the immediate resignations of married whoremeisters David "Huggies" Vitter and Duke Cunningham and closeted, hypocritical and self-loathing gays such as Larry Craig and Mark Foley, as well as adulterous "family men" such as John "Promise But Not Marital Vow Keeper" Ensign and Chris "Craigslist" Lee and stupendously corrupt little trolls like convicted felon Tom DeLay, they, too, can shut the fuck up.

OK, so Weiner's married and he'd sent a picture of his distended shorts to several women on Twitter. That was stupid. So he lied about it and said his Twitter account was hacked. That was stupider. And the stupidest thing of all was Weiner saying he didn't recognize his own cock (not only do we all know what it looks like since we see it several times a day but we measure them with micrometers and know the length to the last micromillimeter).

How does this have any bearing on his fitness to help lead this country as a legislator? How does this have any bearing on his voting record?

Rep. Allyson Schwartz, you, too, can shut the fuck up as well as Tim Kaine and all the other Democratic cowards who give away to charity the exact sums that they got from Weiner, thereby showing their own strict moral rectitude. Nancy Pelosi, you withered, hypocritical bitch, you, too, can shut the fuck up by demanding an investigation into WeinerGate when you yourself took impeachment of the Bush war criminals "off the table". If anyone in the House needs to be investigated, Madam Leader, it's you and your collusive relationship with health care lobbyists.

If Ted Kennedy could survive Chappaquiddick for four decades and help pass a massive raft of progressive legislation, if he could get a second chance to make good (I'd say he did), then Anthony Weiner deserves a second chance, too.

Because I'd sure hate to see a Republican grab his seat simply by virtue that he never sent his penis-distended underwear to someone on Twitter.
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Blogger Leslie Parsley said...
Bravo. I'm so sick of the hypocrites on both sides of the aisle and in the media. And I'm sick of the jokes, which aren't witty or tasteful. Good for you for saying what needs to be said.

Blogger Lsamsa said...
Well said.
Also very appropriate to add a reminder about Ted Kennedy.
As for the 'media'...most are all just glorified 'Enquirer/Globe' types now...they should be ignored as such.

Blogger Bartender Cabbie said...
A good deal of the hoopla comes from the fact that the man is saddled with the unfortunate last name of "Weiner."

Blogger Pangolin said...
It's all very basic.

We live on a planet, that is ball shaped floating in space. Michael Tobis explains it: http://www.grist.org/article/my-little-world-and-yours-too

Your fair share of the world is tiny. You are using more than your fair share by simple virtue of being a person able to read this; a first worlder. The wealthiest 1% are using thousands of shares. The only way to keep this imbalance going is to lie to people, distract them, and if needed, kill them.

Jobs: The wealthy are unwilling to pay U.S. workers more than Chinese workers. Therefore there will ALWAYS be a surplus of labor in the U.S.. Automation simply makes this worse as machines multiply the amount of work one person can achieve.

Budget: The budget was balanced and running a surplus under the Clinton tax plan. Simply returning to that plan would run a surplus again. Again, the wealthy are unwilling to sacrifice and keep actual solutions out of the conversation.

etc, etc, etc, with Climate Change, Medical Care or practically any other issue you care to name. The greed of a few blockades real change for the better.

The facts are that the MSM is engaged in an Orwellian propaganda program to keep the majority shut up and stupid. If the majority put up with it they deserve the consequences.

Blogger Pangolin said...
This comment has been removed by the author.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Don't let's forget Weiner also sent all those charming messages to women about wanting to choke them with his cock. Yeah?

Blogger rose said...
You called Nancy Pelosi a "withered bitch." Sounds like an age-ist AND sexist comment to me, Jill. Truthfully, Pelosi looks pretty damn good for a 71-year old woman.

Blogger Jill said...
Except that if you look at the byline on this post, it isn't me who wrote it. JP obviously has a different worldview about such things than I do, but I'm not going to censor the post because of one offhand remark. As a withered bitch myself, I think I have some moral standing on this, and JP and I have an agreement that I can edit where necessary. When I read this piece, there were things I wasn't crazy about (such as the photos, which make me want to scrub my eyeballs with brillo). But when you have a group blog, even one only marginally a group blog like this one, either you're going to be such a ridiculous purist that it becomes a chore to read, or you're going to have to sometimes let things go.

Blogger rose said...
Sorry I attributed that comment to you! But hey, you're only in your early or mid-50's. You're far from being a withered bitch!
Anthony Weiner created and manifested his current problems....no one did it for him. Should a MATURE married man, in his mid 40's and a congressman, put photos of his DICK on the internet and flirt sexually with countless women? Should he have been in contact with a 17-year old girl? Hell no. So really, he has no one to blame but himself for this insanity. What an idiot he is. He signed his own politcal death warrant.

Anonymous gil mann said...
Rose, I'm living proof that withered bitch status can be achieved by one's mid-thirties (and regardless of gender). JP's still a creep for saying it, though.

Blogger rose said...
Right on, Gil...!!! And regarding The Weiner---I'm definitely no prude, but I'm disgusted that he displayed his little weiner on Twitter. It's so childish---something most BOYS outgrow by the time they are in tenth grade. It really shows the stuff Weiner is made of---emotionally and mentally. He's very immature.

Blogger buyaionkinah said...
A good deal of the hoopla comes from the fact that the man is saddled with the unfortunate last name of "Weiner."