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Friday, June 05, 2009

OMG, where does one even START?
Posted by Jill | 5:22 AM
And just when she'd struck a reasonably sane tone on the murder of Dr. George Tiller, too, the Wasilla WhatTheFuck is back:
In a speech introducing Michael Reagan — the son of former President Ronald Reagan — to an audience in Anchorage, Palin warned that the government is planning to "bail out debt ridden states" so it can "get in there and control the people."

Now wait a minute. Is she talking about California? The land of Godless heathens and homosexuals? I thought a good Xrazy Xtian like Sarah Palin WANTED to control Godless heathens and homosexuals through government designed to foster a Christian Nation? I'm so confused now.

Maybe we should see what she actually said:
"We need to be aware of the creation of a fearful population, and fearful lawmakers, being led to believe that big government is the answer, to bail out the private sector, because then government gets to get in there and control it," she said. "And mark my words, this is going to be next, I fear, bail out next debt-ridden states. Then government gets to get in there and control the people."

Where has this idiot learned English? From George W. Bush? Does she have Wernicke-Korsakoff's Syndrome too?
So now Federal aid is "bailing out states"? OK, then let's see all the red states in the south give back the two-bucks-for-every-dollar-they-put-in, shall we?

I'm waiting.

Still waiting.

Oh, so when it's a Southern red state, Federal money is just fine. Got it.

She also brought back the good old days of George W. Bush in talking about Iraq:
Though the bulk of her remarks focused on government encroachment into the private sector, and praise for former President Reagan's views on limited government, the former vice presidential candidate briefly touched on national security. She told the crowd that "the terrorists are still dead set against us" and that her son Track is still deployed in Iraq.

"It is war over there, so it will not be war over here," she said. "And it had better still be our mission that we win, they lose."

OK, what's your strategy for that, Champ? And do you have an original thought in your head?

But what I really want to know is this: How on earth did Alaska ever elect this woman Governor? I realize that men outnumber women in Alaska, but is this moronic aging prom queen really the best they can do?

Of course for All Things Alaska, I go to Mudflats, where AK Muckraker does not disappoint, because she was actually present at this Fesitval of Moronitude and Ritual Butchery of the English Language:
I have, out of some sense of morbid fascination, typed for your reading displeasure, almost the entire text of what she said. It was 17 minutes long. Everyone got your plastic cows? Let the waterboarding begin.

(I’ll make a couple interjections now and then so you’re not alone. You can just imagine sitting next to me in the theatre, and me leaning over and whispering into a pair of parentheses now and again…)

We have an awesome guest, a guest who is affecting our culture in such a positive way. We need him to keep on being bold and we’re counting on Michael Reagan to help educate America.


(Should we keep count of how many times she says “bold?” I bet it’s at least three.)

I want to welcome tonight our good Lieutenant Governor Sean Parnell who I can’t see, but I know he’s here. (applause) My brother Chuck Heath is here, and my husband Alaska’s First Dude Todd Palin is here somewhere. (applause)


(I thought we weren’t calling him that anymore. I guess “First Dude” is back in.)
So I have the honor of getting to speak with you for a bit here before I get to introduce to you Michael Reagan, and what I want to do in introducing Michael is to continue to encourage him to continue to be bold

(I elbow you in the ribs)
and to call it like he sees it, and to screw political correctness that some would expect him to have to adhere to.

(Oh my God….did she just say “Screw Political Corectness?” Will there be t-shirts?)
We want him to be bold. We need him to be bold.

(We are stifling laughter)
Mr. Reagan, we need your voice to be loud and strong, and we appreciate him. He doesn’t shy away from the tough issues and that is so good. He never lets anyone tell him to sit down and shut up, and I would hope Alaska our voice too will be heard across this nation. I look forward to hearing from Michael Reagan tonight because America must learn from him, from his remarkable father, and that remarkable presidency.

(”You’re going to transcribe this, right?” you whisper. “Yeah, looks like I’m going to have to,” I answer.)

More snarky goodness here.

But all snark aside, here's the guy whom this fetophile lunatic was praising so highly:


How much of a sick fuck do you have to be in order to advocate putting exploding hand grenades into the rectums of infants?

How about advocating the murder of people who disagree with you? I mean, the 9/11 "truth"-ers may be tiresome, but seriously. Murder?

Michael Reagan sees Sarah Palin as Dad With Boobs, which clearly means that he has Daddy issues that put those of George W. Bush to shame.

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3 Comments:
Blogger Steve said...
1. It's not just the southern red states which lead the nation in federal welfare, i.e., more dollars received then put in. Alaska consistently ranks numero tres in that same department. Then there's that whole Alaska Permanent Fund socialistmarxistpinko thingy.

2. Michael Reagan was the adopted son of St.Ronnie The Magnificent. Which kind of fits in with the plight of Repos and Reagan Democrats who now are left with the amazingly detailed life-like bronze statues and plaster busts of their former glory.
6/5/09, 12:18 PM  
Blogger jurassicpork said...
Just call us the United States of Zion.
6/5/09, 5:15 PM  
Blogger rose said...
I love Ron Reagan, Jr. (although I can't stand Michael)
Ron is on Air America every afternoon. He's cool!
6/6/09, 11:54 PM  
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