Allow the president to invade a neighboring nation, whenever he shall deem it necessary to repel an invasion, and you allow him to do so whenever he may choose to say he deems it necessary for such a purpose—and you allow him to make war at pleasure. ~Abraham Lincoln

(Major tips o’ the tinfoil hat to Digby and Jill at Brilliant at Breakfast.)

There are some wingnuts who ought to be simply ignored. Then there are those who ought to be placed outside the protection of the first amendment. Philip Atkinson is just such a case. By an act of Congress, this man ought to be barred from touching any writing implement, whether it be a pen, pencil, typewriter, keyboard, a brush, a lump of coal, a spray can or even a Bic lighter. Violation of this congressional edict should be punishable by no less than twenty consecutive life imprisonments at Abu Ghraib, fines totaling Bush’s national deficit, being endlessly bombarded by unsold copies of Treason and Culture Warrior and falling pianos.

Philip Atkinson simply isn’t qualified to write an eye chart or even spray paint coordinates on the street for city workers much less write apologist pieces proposing that we make George W. Bush dictator for life. Or rather, that we ought to passively stand by while George W. Bush does the Napoleon thing and crowns himself dictator for life since the democracy thing, after over 230 years, really isn’t working out.

Yes, he actually wrote that (click on the .jpeg for a larger image) for Family Security Matters. The original article is… Ooops. Seems that they’ve been doing some late spring cleaning.

Well, luckily, whatever’s put on the Internet never truly disappears thanks to a marvelous new invention still unbeknownst to wingnuts called “copy and paste” from “cached pages.”

Think of Charles Krauthammer with a brain tumor. Alright, most of us all already do. But think of Mister Empire on the Potomac and take him to two or three more extreme levels. Got that? Well, now you have an idea of what Philip Atkinson’s all about.

Because on August 3rd, Atkinson penned an understandably exclusive yet mighty screed for FSM entitled, “Conquering the Drawbacks of Democracy.”

No, folks, I’m afraid this isn’t yet another benevolent hoax sprung on us by the geniuses over at the Onion. I’m afraid people like this actually exist. And, predictably, it just gets scarier and scarier all the way to its harrowing conclusion when Atkinson reaches a fascist crescendo with the words,

He could then follow Caesar’s example and use his newfound popularity with the military to wield military power to become the first permanent president of America, and end the civil chaos caused by the continually squabbling Congress and the out-of-control Supreme Court.

President Bush can fail in his duty to himself, his country, and his God, by becoming “ex-president” Bush or he can become “President-for-Life” Bush: the conqueror of Iraq, who brings sense to the Congress and sanity to the Supreme Court. Then who would be able to stop Bush from emulating Augustus Caesar and becoming ruler of the world? For only an America united under one ruler has the power to save humanity from the threat of a new Dark Age wrought by terrorists armed with nuclear weapons.

There. It’s out. He said it. George W. Bush should make himself Emperor For Life regardless of the rules of succession, term limits, the 22nd amendment, checks and balances, our three branch and two party system of government, and each and every rule of democracy that has governed our great Republic until there is nothing left of it but bloated Republicans gnawing on its bones and fighting each other over the gristle and cartilage.

We ought to let George W. Bush, a man who isn’t even fit to manage a McDonald’s third shift let alone the free world, to continue running roughshod over the rest of the world until he finally gets it right, even if he’s older than Reagan’s grandfather and taking potshots at Barney’s and Miss Beazley’s progeny’s progeny with Saddam Hussein’s pearl-handled revolvers because Laura still won’t tell him where she hid the soft pretzels.

“But… but Atkinson doesn’t represent the administration or the right wing establishment, so how can you make such a claim, you liberal windbag?”

Well, ordinarily you’d be right except for this one disturbing little fact: Sourcewatch offers a brief but enlightening rundown on the FSM. Seems these people are more than just an organization dedicated to creating kick-ass soccer moms. In fact, it seems they’re merely a front organization for another outfit called the Center for Security Policy, a twenty year-old right wing organization dedicated to unilaterally kicking ass the good ole fashioned American way. Among its esteemed current and former alumnus: Dick Cheney. Douglas Feith. Elliot Abrams. Richard Perle. And Frank Gaffney.

In other words, some of the most shithouse rat on fire insane psychopaths that this nascent Second Roman Republic’s ever produced.

“He could then follow Caesar’s example…” Has he ever considered the possibility that our latter day Senate could then follow the example set by their ancient predecessors? I guess that dictator for life plan of his still has some bugs in it.

But let’s take a look at the earlier part of the article to see how and why Atkinson seems to think that our Great 231 year-old Experiment in democracy may not be such a good idea, after all:

President George W. Bush is the 43rd President of the United States. He was sworn in for a second term on January 20, 2005 after being chosen by the majority of citizens in America to be president.

Uuuuuh. Okaaaaay…

Yet in 2007 he is generally despised, with many citizens of Western civilization expressing contempt for his person and his policies, sentiments which now abound on the Internet. This rage at President Bush is an inevitable result of the system of government demanded by the people, which is Democracy.

OK, you see where he’s going with this, don’t you?

The inadequacy of Democracy, rule by the majority, is undeniable – for it demands adopting ideas because they are popular, rather than because they are wise.

Yes, you read that right. Atkinson actually is saying here that if we don’t like George W. Bush then he has to choose between either his “president” or democracy. And, to him, it’s a no brainer:

This means that any man chosen to act as an agent of the people is placed in an invidious position: if he commits folly because it is popular, then he will be held responsible for the inevitable result. If he refuses to commit folly, then he will be detested by most citizens because he is frustrating their demands.

To play Devil’s advocate here, Bush did commit a folly when the idea was very popular: When he decided to invade Afghanistan ostensibly to take on the Taliban, his approval ratings were at an alltime high. They were obviously almost as high when he’d decided to invade Iraq almost a year and a half later, even though no one of any consequence or with any balls had the good sense to ask why we were detouring from the war on terror especially at a time when al Qaida’s top leadership was still largely at large or even unaccounted for.

Here’s the difference: Bush and Cheney knew that Iraq had nothing to do with 9/11. He knew that Cheney strongarmed CIA analysts into giving him cherry-picked intelligence that at last told him what the administration wanted to hear, that they lied to the American people and our military, our press and, finally, the families whose sons and daughters, wives and husbands, brothers and sisters came home in steel coffins to no fanfare or acknowledgement.

That’s not mere folly: That’s outright deceit. That’s treachery.

So Atkinson has a cure for that, an ultimate punishment for those of us who dare ask for accountability from a man who so casually condemned what will surely be 4000 Americans to death by this year’s end so we can get our hands on the third largest oil deposits on God’s scorched earth, even if it costs us another half a trillion dollars and several thousands of more lives: Dissolve the democracy, because we can’t have our cake and eat it, too.

But, wait, friends, Romans and fellow countrymen, lend me your ears, for his ideas get even grander:

When faced with the possible threat that the Iraqis might be amassing terrible weapons that could be used to slay millions of citizens of Western Civilization, President Bush took the only action prudence demanded and the electorate allowed: he conquered Iraq with an army.

This dangerous and expensive act did destroy the Iraqi regime, but left an American army without any clear purpose in a hostile country and subject to attack. If the Army merely returns to its home, then the threat it ended would simply return.

In other words, the zombie Saddam would’ve come back by walking on the floor of the Atlantic, this time bringing with him the WMD’s that he temporarily misplaced in Syria in his last months on earth.

Believe it or not, it gets even better:

If President Bush copied Julius Caesar by ordering his army to empty Iraq of Arabs and repopulate the country with Americans, he would achieve immediate results: popularity with his military; enrichment of America by converting an Arabian Iraq into an American Iraq (therefore turning it from a liability to an asset); and boost American prestiege (sic) while terrifying American enemies.

Got that, class? We “allowed” him to cross the Rubicon because the man who doesn’t rule the nation according to the poll numbers was actually following the dictates his we, his bosses, We the People of the United States of America. And now that we don’t like the outcome of the most massive act of deception since Vietnam and the Gulf of Tonkin… Well, to paraphrase a famous quote about war and generals, democracy is much too serious an affair to be left in the hands of an electorate.

Now, that kind of takes the edge off his brilliant foreign policy idea that George W. Bush should nuke Iraq, doesn't it? Doesn't seem like such a shocking idea anymore, does it? Kind of like, well, shooting someone in the foot while pulling off a bandaid.

This man Atkinson has a percolating pustule for a brain and if anyone ever sees him getting within arm’s reach again of anything that could be used as a tool for writing, we ought to be allowed to use any and all means at our disposal to prevent his use of them before people more dangerous and only slightly more sane than he begin to listen.